missing moments

I was floating in her comfortable kiln, nice
out of the matrix, I stared at strange eyes;
pampered so much, point of discontent,
sent away every day, changing study moment.

small:

I saw my hair cut going the way looking good
blank moments, and not what I expected to see;
similar to it, apple it is at every incident I see
the moments miss, much different under the hood.

normal:

as friends we whistled, what better than that,
missed the moments when it superseded itself,
kid I was all the while, infinite space and liberty
this instant, I am not to be anything like that.

alive with all veins powered, magic possessed,
magic imparted, missing moments in the womb;
a switch years later, they mourn at my remains,
magic faded, again in moments, and the tomb.

for every time, destined for a small great change,
it tricks the conscience and the mind, to freeze
else, the mind will figure out the intertwined maze,
but the uncertainty and ignorant blink, needs us.

I used to be vigilant every second, much
but it offered me just noticeable cliché
it spiked when I was not, unseen moments
I gave up, now I un-touch the missing moments.