Just Like That!

Monday, March 23, 2009

godspeed 2

continued from godspeed 1

..the next morning, I had got up a little earlier and hence, called up my Mom, before leaving the house. this meant, I could listen to some music on the bus, all through my journey. I like the last window seat, and there I was with the scenery and music. it was a cold morning.

beside me sat G, not really eager for any pleasantries. I didn’t give a shocking reaction on seeing G. I had read enough novels and seen television shows, where the shocking reaction is followed by a conversation like:

‘you!   You scared the crap out of me!’
‘didn’t mean to.’
‘but you did. I know you are not real. I’m hallucinating or this is something weird.’
‘I’m for real.’
‘I don’t believe you.’
‘whack! Now does it feel real?’
With hands on the paining cheek, ‘feels real! Who are you and why are you here?’

I didn’t want to warm my cheeks that way, on this cold morning. I needed to think something else.

“I know, but don’t do it. you are sure, but don’t involve her. we have a lot to talk about.” G said and waited.

i felt a jolt on these words. I was about to think of a simple strategy. here were my exact thoughts. 
“I know G is visible to me. I know I’m not crazy. I can just ask the girl ahead if she too can see G. that should put things in place. If I involve her, it’ll prove that I’m not crazy, I’m sure and this freak incident will make sense.”
I figured G could read my thoughts. But I hadn’t even started thinking about it. how could G answer before I thought of the question. Maybe a fluke, but now was the time when I freaked out.

so i asked the bull’s eye question, “who are you and why are you here?” G was looking at a poem on the bus. I had to repeat twice and get G’s interest. I think it (let me refer to G as it for the moment) was thinking, which was odd, since I thought of it as incapable of waiting to process anything, think and respond.

G said, “either I can tell you that and leave immediately, or I stay and you don’t ask me that question for some time, and we can talk. If it helps, I was the one who saved you at that improbable moment, which was not supposed to be that way.” 

I wondered, “is this some sort of an ultimatum from a lame stalker? What the hell is wrong around me?” I thought about the proposal for some time. 

since I am not a cat,  I hoped for good that my curiosity won’t kill me. basically, I opted for the “OR” part of the proposal. to be frank, deep within I was a little elated because, whatever was happening, seemed to be out of ordinary, and when life is ordinary for a long time, such moments arouse the devil in you. and the ridiculous number of super-hero flicks around, don’t seem to help.. especially when you know, you won’t be killed or something..

so I thought, let me have our first effective communication/conversation. although apart from “who are you, and why are you here”, I really don’t think I had any arsenal for interrogation. and talking about weather was hardly the intro you want to use at this time. finally I remembered G’s own words and began our conversation.

“what is it that you want to talk about?” I asked still suspicious of G.

G looked askew at me, as if to remind me that it had told me something to help me out. It had. But I didn’t understand, what it meant? When had G saved me, from what and why was it not supposed to be? too many questions for which I didn’t know the answers, and that is exactly what annoyed me of examinations and G’s words.

“is it because I don’t trust you completely, that you are not speaking?” G didn’t respond. I took it as an yes.
“will you tell me what you saved me from, when, why and any other Ws?” G nodded a No.
“do you think I myself will figure it out?” G nodded with his lips curled, as if to say, “probably.”

somewhere  deep inside me (I don’t know how deep), I felt G was correct. I wanted to feel the scene of G pulling me out from an abyss, or was probably feeling the scene. It must have been pretty deep inside me, since it was a hazy scene. Nevertheless, I had a sudden good feeling of belief.

“so if I trust you completely, then we should be good to go, right?” G gave one of the positive nods. I felt at ease, for no explicable reason.
“thanks for the fruitful conversation”, I said. G hadn’t said a word.

“look forward, godspeed.” I thought I remembered G saying, but nope. It was gone.

“Excuse me Sir, aren’t you getting down here today?” the driver lady asked me, and got me out of G’s frame. i realized and got down.

before I got on with the day’s work, I remembered G’s supposedly parting words, a day ago. "
You’ll believe me tomorrow, godspeed!"

i had intentions of listening to some music, not facing it.
I stopped pondering, and got on with the day.. 

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Sunday, March 15, 2009

godspeed 1

6:59 am, Monday. a minute and my alarm goes off with the ‘blind melon – no rain’ guitar theme. With blinking eyes I switch it off, and as always wonder ‘why is there no work day, where you get up and feel you don’t need to sleep anymore?’ I get up, put on my playlist and check my stock values. I don’t see a 1000% gain. I am not the top 10 richest person in the country. That could only mean, I need to get ready and go to work.

morning chores, yoga, little workout, breakfast and I am ambling to the bus stop. It is cold, and 8:13 am. my bus is in 5 minutes. I call my mom as usual, and am talking to her. All through my conversation, the entity keeps staring at me. Let’s call this entity as G. to begin with, I ignore and continue talking. Finally, its 5 minutes to get down and I hang up. The stare still continued. I looked around and I was not mistaken. G was looking at me, unblinking. I was reluctant to ask anything. I continued ignoring.

I got down and thought, ‘what was all that about?’ it didn’t seem right. I had never seen G before in the bus, or anywhere. Thankful, that finally I was away, I started walking towards my office. G was right alongside me. seemed to glide swiftly, though I didn’t know for sure. It was getting ridiculous. I gathered some strength and said, “I think you are following me.” G nodded in disapproval. “what does a nod mean?” “why are you following me? it is freaking me out. What do you want?”

G said, “the forest, the cliff, you and the 2 year old kid sitting. The man with the lamp who led you to the house was smiling. The door had two roses attached to it. Before opening the door, you looked back anticipating someone.”

I was terrified. Those were the only remnant bits and pieces of my yester night’s dreams, I could remember. word to word. I didn’t know what the dreams meant or if they meant anything at all. But I hadn’t shared the dream with anyone. And if I had to, what do I say? But these were the exact words that were left of the dreams.. and I heard the exact words from G.

“You’ll believe me tomorrow, godspeed!” I thought I heard these words from G but nope, G was gone. I swiped my card key and entered my office.

something was not right, but I don’t ponder too much in life. 24 hours may or may not bring something. I couldn’t care less… but I had no idea what was coming. the next morning…

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